What I Learned from Guys as a Girl

*Note-Please read the previous post before reading this one!

That's funny...you wouldn't expect to learn anything from guys except stupid and innappropiate things or how to beat the system and get away with things you shouldn't have done. Oh yes, guys were useful for that stuff because I was a Tomboy. I got along very well with all the Smart/Unsmart Almost Popular guys.

That's beside the the point right now. I respected guys more and understood why they did some things. The best way to solve your confusions about something is to spend time around it. In this case, boys never really made sense to me. They could be so smart and so dumb at the same time. Most of the time, it was for laughs. Hell, it was always for laughs at my lunch table.

Sure, call me crazy for wasting so much time around boys when I could be with my girl friends at lunch. Perhaps it was crush on my new best friend at the time (current boyfriend now) or that I just wanted to prove I was no coward. There were some things I probably shouldn't have heard and learned about. Inappropiate jokes that I would laugh at to forget, the accusations of sleep overs the guys had about surfing porn sites. God, we're so young and they're already into that crap. Ah, so be it. Some say I'm too young to have a boyfriend. Those are the people that don't keep up with the times that things you should do later in life start happening earlier. Look at Jamie Lynn Spears!

But now I'm trailing off topic. So let me tell you what I really learned and what I'll keep in mind. For now, I'm going to call my "new best friend at the time" my boyfriend to shorten things up. So anyway, my boyfriend had this friend. Best friend. And his best friend was really nice. Sweet. My second grade crush. I wouldn't lie, but I'd dwindle from the truth of addmittance. We got along pretty well. Made fun of each other playfully. His sister was and Under-Popular. He understood how I felt.

Every once in a while, he'd tell me something. Something his sister said (she had seduced me when i was a Follower) about me. Whether it was nasty or nice. Maybe it was a small conversation here and there. It was him that made me appreciate unexpected kindness more. He was sort of that big brother I wish I had. I make sure that my boyfriend doesn't know I feel that way. Our relationship is a whole other story.

What I learned from my boyfriend was sincerity. Some things we only said to each other. There were certain things we only talked to each other about, certain things we would to to each other for. No one else. It made it special. Love is probably another one. That's another one for later, but I also learned not to regret or worry what boys think about your actions. Most likelyif you did something stupid, irrational, or embarassing, they'll forget or they won't give you a hard time (unless they vow to make you never forget in a funny way. If they're going to make your life hell, then that guy must really remember things).

Guys don't remember anything. Well, maybe birthdays and certain things they only need to remember. More like what they want to remember. Like homework, test dates, and project due dates are irrelavant in their world. Maybe I learned to procrasonate from them too. A bad habit I picked up huh...

I learned a lot of humor too. Dirty jokes, clean jokes, all out stupid jokes, but those jokes fit in to the perfect conversations that needed enlightenment with humor. It upped my social reputation with everyone else. I was no longer a total dork that had failed to reach Under-Popular.

Well, it's late. I'll write more tomorrow.

Popularity

You see, as I was thinking about the past years, I remembered when I was in between things. Friends and decisions to make. Not quite on one side, and not ready to be on either side.

It was the year my best friend abandoned me for a guy...yeah, a guy she broke up with anyway. She tore me apart...piece by piece until I couldn't take it anymore and pushed her away. She did, once, and I just remembered, try to come back, but by then, I had sort of let go.

She started my friend problems now. I dwindled with the people who were, in my school, the under popular. You see, our social ladder sorta went like this:

Popular
Under-Popular
Followers (Somewhat Popular)
Smart/Unsmart Sorta Popular
Smarts
Idiots
Gays
Nuetral

Popular being the highest of course.

God, I was so niave. The Under-Populars were the people who associated with the Popular group. Under-Popular were the people you would go to get dirt on the unpopular. It sorta went something like this. The Nuertrals associated with everyone, they were passive and sometimes would jump between categories before returning back to nuetral. Then the second lowest were the gays (I didn't come up with this social ladder for my school. I have no hard feelings for gays and support same-sex relationships!) who befriended mostly the idiots.

The idiots, well, sometimes they included the class clowns and the people who were hopelessly failing classes, but they were friends with the Smarts too. Maybe friends isn't the right word...entertainment. The idiots entertained the Smarts and in return they would recieve some help.

The smarts, they were the people who were A+ in every class. With the Gays and Idiots, they hated popular people and they dared not to speak to anyone above their social class unless it was needed. Of course there were exceptions, but let's not split hairs.

The Smart/Unsmart-Sorta Popular was the category I fit into along with my current boyfriend's friends. Only one of us was top of the class. He was super smart, but he had the good looks and wasn't too nerdy. He wasn't a bragger and that made him likeable. I excelled in language arts and math, kept a steady science and history grade. There were a few idiots that could have been in the Idiots class, but they managed to fit in with us because they weren't all that dumb. You see, the Smart/Unsmart-Sorta Populars associated with the Followers, Under-Popular, and sometimes when needed, the Popular group.

The followers were the people who were wannabe popular people that befriended the Under-Populars in order to get to the highest level. They followed the Under Popular person or people they befriended until they either learned that being popular isn't everything, or they actually achieved getting there.

Under-Populars were, as I said the people who had the dirt on all the popular people. They mingled with them and knew their way around the popular crowd and they seduced many followers. That's how I saw them, but somehow, I befriended one of them when I was supposed to be a Smart/Unsmart-Somewhat Popular with my new best friend (my current BF).

I wanted to achieve being an Under-Popular, but I was seduced like everyone else who were Followers until I felt I was being hurt too much, perhaps another reason why my friendship broke off with my ex-bestfriend.

Eventually I learned better and settled down in the Smart/Unsmart Somewhat Popular class and felt comfortable. I had my own circle of friends, associated with a few followers and even a few Under-Populars that weren't low enough to be a follower, but sorta weren't qualified to be an Under-Popular.

I worked the top part of the social ladder. I understood that I could have been better off as a nuetral, but my heart lay in the Smart/UnsmartSomewhat Popular class. It was the first years of getting to know my new best friend better.

Our lunch tables were classified by the Social Classes and I was proud to be the only gal at a guy's table. I didn't care about the stares or comments by teachers, I wanted to show the world I had guts! So that's where more story shall start tomorrow....what I learned and am still learning from my lunch table and my boyfriend's friends.

RIP-Heath Leadger

Only 28. It's such a shame with so much talent and I loved Brokeback Mountain. May he rest in peace.

1 Year Aniversery

A life. So precious. So cared for. And gone within in seconds.

Yesterday, January 10th, was the one year anniversery of a car crash in my community. It involved teenagers who had most likely been racing on a major road. One of the cars crashed. Three lives were taken. Gone in fire and flames, into smoke and ashes, and disappeared from the face of the earth as if no more would become of them.

A year since that day doesn't come lightly. It's hard to hold out against such a terrible thought. Those three teenagers were young, only high schoolers, no older than many people in the small community. That road is so clsoe to me, I'm not even a mile away, and I didn't particularly know any of those kids, but it still makes me feel sad.

It was as if something had been torn out of me. I'm very fortunate that I have only expierienced so few tragic things. Things are so precious, people, relationships, money, and so on. Things we should never take for granted and enjoy till depleted or gone. Nature has a way with taking things away from us so fast. Too fast like water slipping through our fingers.

So I may be a few days late with talking about this incident, but if you drive, or when you drive, go no more than the speed limit. SLOW DOWN! Save a life. Buckle up too. If anything, go below the speed limit because in all truth, slow and steady wins the race of life. You can't be in the fast lane forever, even though sometimes it feels as if the years pass by.

Take some time and think that someone close and dear to you, or anyone around, is close to being gone. Anyone at anytime because of car accidents of going over the speed limit. This event may not happen close to you and not close to your heart, but you have to have some damn consideration for our world. We're talking about our world's future because its fate is held in our children's and their children's hands.

So in their memory...do these things at least once this year...actually, please do this everyday

1. If someone has had too much to drink, call a cab or drive them home.
2. Go under the speed limit.
3. Don't talk or text on your cell phone and drive.
4. Wear a seatbelt, please.
5. Obey all traffic laws.
6. Don't race, slow and steady wins the race of life.
7. Don't drink or smoke while driving.
8. Don't try to make a yellow light.
9. Be considerate to other drivers.
10. Be thankful after you've reach your destination.

My Birthday

Well, another year older they say, and my age for now is disclosed to those of you reading, but I'd just like to say that I'm not sure I'm ready to move forward so fast, but then again, I better be because I ain't going to get any younger.

There are so many things to cherish when you get older and so many things that leave too, but the things you recieve (and I ain't talking presents) are very nice. Kindness, forgiveness, thankfulness, and friendships.

So I'll say this, the next time you turn a year older, remember everything and be satisfied and stop regretting all those bad times and emphasize on the good times.